I have a ton of energy right now

I am so incredibly excited that it is now springtime and a weekend!!! Things have been oh so crazy for oh so long, that I think crazy is becoming normal so it doesn't feel crazy any more. I dropped my physics class, which is one less thing for me to freak about, and frees up a boat load of time for me to study! Whoo-hoo for more study time! Kinda, because that now means that I actually have to fill that time with studying.

Lets make a list:

1. My crazy avocado paper got turned in today. Finally!!! I only started it, what, 8 WEEKS ago!!But I really like that class:

a) because the topics of conversation are HILARIOUS!

b) my classmates are super fun in general

c) it is cancelled A LOT

d) the slow pace is a reprieve from my other fast paced classes.

2. I am starting an argument paper and picking the topic is hard because there are so many good topics that I can't seem to pick.

3. There are only 2 months left in the semester!! Crazy!! Yet awesome all at the same time!

4. I have been spending some time thinking this week about how much of a self talker I am. Really. It seems like ALL DAY long I am constantly talking myself into and out of doing things. I have talked myself into lunch, studying, sleeping, "napping", reading a book in class despite being rude", not reading a book in class because it would be rude", and so many more things that I couldn't begin to list.

5. I want to go to next weeks baseball game. I think I have more school spirit for non-football sports than for football. Not that I don't have school spirit for football, just more for other things.

6. I am listening to Bekah sing rather off key while she is "tanning" in my parents backyard. I say tanning like that because it is really burning, she just doesn't want to believe that.

7. Bekah and I are at my parents house tonight because our AC is broken. She had wanted to stay here anyway, but I wanted to wait and just come over here in the morning. She got her way by default.

8. I read Utopia by Thomas More just because I saw it in the bookstore, and it had a pretty cover, and it was mentioned in Ever After which is a movie that I like very much. That was one of the things I self-talked myself into buying, then reading instead of studying, then possibly using to further my argument for prohibition of alcohol in my argument paper. I have since self-talked myself out of using that as a topic due to the lack of current media on the topic.)

9. I love, love, love pickles. Dill pickles that is. Cindy got me some. She is awesome. Sometimes I think I cohabitate (is that the right word? Is that a word at all actually) better with her than I do with Bekah.

10. A sister is a really great thing to have. I miss all of mine.

11. I am really enjoying where I am at in life right now. Though I am constantly thinking about things I need to do that would make where I am at more productive for myself in the long run, I need to do those things.

12. I am taking the MCAT in the fall. Just for practice, I'm sure I will take it again. Yay for med-school entrance exams.

13. Some goofy person on Greenwell Springs Road (the same road that I live on) paid $20 for me to ship them a stupid diploma frame rather than just drive to LSU and pick one up. I was quite frustrated with them earlier this week because it was quite the hassle. If it were not rude and unprofessional I would write them a letter informing them of their utter stupidity regarding this matter.

14. I am bored with this now. So I am going to stop and go back to browsing el interneto.

So how am I going to get a 5 page paper out of this:

A post to the long neglected public who reads this blog

No excuses, I haven't posted, so sorry.

So, I was sorely disappointed with the BCM last night. At least with the family group leaders who headed the circle of people that I was in. I expected a bit more than what was delivered. It started out with going around the circle and answering questions that were on a sheet of paper. We only answered the first 2 questions( which were like name, hometown, major, why you chose LSU etc.) Then the group leaders ( if you can call them that, they "lead" the conversation no where) said something along the lines of " Wow, these questions are pretty deep, why don't we make up our own questions?!?! So, whats your favorite food/drink?!" The previous questions were good. They asked things like "how are your parents handling your going to college?, What are your spiritual beliefs?, What sort of church did you attend growing up?, What are your spiritual goals for the year?, Who has inspired you most spiritually?" Good questions, way better than "What is your favorite food?". I hoped for more, I am not necessarily surprised, but a tad disappointed. It's not like it shattered all my hopes and dreams or anything, I mean, I do realize that they function similarly to a religious institution, so I didn't expect too much, just more than was delivered. And perhaps if I stayed longer I would have gotten to have a more meaningful conversation with one of the people there ( Beege and I bailed after the questions), which is really all I wanted, but, oh well. I don't think it was really the time and place for that sort of thing? I will attempt going to the regular Thursday night bible study a few more times, and if no fruit seems appears from it, then that will be the end of it, but if by any chance God allows even one ounce of Glory to come to His name through my going, then last night will have been worth it, and I will continue to seek to bring Him glory in that manner.

So, aside from my futile attempts to build fruitful relationships, school starts next week, and I am taking an intense beginning Spanish class that I am excited about! I hope that my Spanish will really improve, so get prepared to hear me rambling half Spanish, half English sentences and then laughing at myself, because that is most likely what is going to happen.

Hello to Apartment D, goodbye to my chucks

Welcome to our humble abode:

The daybed that turned out looking rather nice with the canopy!bed, dresser, bookshelves

desk quaint little bathroom

And now some parting shots of my very first pair of chucks:
The shoe that started it all!

Alas, my stinkin' bike ripped it, and it no longer has the ability to stay on my foot

a problem, that all the staples in the world couldn't fix.

And for those of you that know I was writing it, I got a 100 on my paper.

And lastly, despite all our efforts, I somehow managed to get poison ivy while hiking at Tunica. Yup, craziness.

My theatre professor said she likes house church, so I figured I would tell her more about it...

An assingment this week in theatre was this:

Choose any familiar space where people gather. Discuss the dynamics involved in how people move in this space, how they address one another, and how the experience allows for any sort of communal engagement.

And I answered it like this:

Text below includes a bit of commentary that is in orange.

When asked to name a familiar place where people gather, the first place that comes to mind is Bob’s house. Every Sunday morning, and even during the week, multiple people gather there to discuss what God has shown us in our time with Him. This is where we, the Church, meaning the people who make up the body of Christ - not a building, meet. Bob’s house is not huge, but it holds the 10-15 of us who comprise this house church. We move and function rather like a family in a house does. At any time I could go grab a bit to eat out of the fridge ( It's not like it's not on the counter waiting for me to snatch a piece), or hop on the computer to “Google” something ( or get Bob or Beege to look up what the thorax of a monkey is so that I can continue to make my stinkin' note cards) , just like a member of the household. I may even go pick up the living room. ( Not that Mrs. Sharon keeps a messy house, just that all us cold people like to drag out every blanket ever made and then leave them all over the place with our pillows)I address everyone as if they were my family (essentially we are family in Christ), and they address me like-wise. People gather in the living room, kitchen, or around the table and just “hang-out” until everyone gets there. Then around 10:30am (if we are lucky) everybody goes into one room to collectively talk about all that God has shown us. It’s not any formal meeting with one person talking the whole time telling you how to be a Christian; it is the body of Christ communing. Here there is no “head-honcho”; there is no child, simply Saints. Every person has the exact same opportunity to hear from God as a “pastor” or “preacher” does. And in the house, everyone can share the revelation from God that they have received. Or they can share the verse that has made the difference in how their week has gone, or simply how they have been changed to be more like Christ that week. There is no one person who is too young to speak, some house churches have 4 and 5 year olds that bring a Word from the Lord that revolutionizes the way that we see things. If you have a question, you ask it. If you have a Word, you speak it. If you have a song, you sing it. No one is spoken down to and no one is demeaned. Everyone is there to uplift and exhort the body of Christ, even in a gentle rebuke. This is the “communal engagement”. ( Just so you know, the term "communal engagement" was how my Anth. teacher described the gathering on monkeys, and now that I have related that term to house church, I automatically picture us as the gathering of a bunch of monkeys).The entire lifestyle of the Saints is a “communal engagement”. Think about it like the human body. Each part of the body is in constant communion with the rest of the body. Each part works together in harmony (communion) to function; the heart, lungs, hands and feet all have their role, and if they don’t fulfill that role then the entire body is hindered and can’t function as it was designed to. The arm simply cannot pop off and decide not to function for a day, it must fulfill its role every moment of every day. If it did pop off, then the blood would not be able to get to it, and it would eventually loose everything that made it alive. Like-wise, a member of the body if Christ must be in constant communion with Christ, and His people. I cannot cease to function without hindering the rest of the body of Christ. And choosing not to function would mean that the blood of, which gives me life, would no longer be able to flow in and through me. The gathering of the Saints is the communal engagement, and it just happens to be at Bob’s house.




Oh, and this is my official 200th post. I didn't want that last goofy thing to be my real 200th post, not that this is much better, but still...

Religion 1001

OK, so this theatre class is becoming more of a religion class for me. This week I had to write a report on how Circus Maximus is like the local movie theatre. For those of you that don't remember Circus Maximus was the Roman arena where 50,000 people gathered to watch wrestling, and animal fighting, or Christians being chase by the animals until they died. Well I did the report and all, but it really got me thinking about how much Circus Maximus really is like the local movie theatre. Back in the day Christians never would have hung around there for "fun" or "fellowship". Circus Maximus meant death for true Christians, the ones that wouldn't renounce their faith to save their skin that is. I think the same can be said our local movie theatre, and the general entertainment that we find in America and the world today. It does not mean physical death, but by golly it could most certainly mean spiritual death. I mean, it is equivalent to walking directly into the enemies camp and sitting there and enjoying the exact same thing that they find entertaining. Sharing in the sin, vile, wickedness that the world likes to put on a movie screen. But we aren't content to partake of it at the theatre alone; we like to invite it into our homes to share with the world there too. Now I can't generalize and say ALL TV, and ALL movies, and ALL video games are bad, and that they ALL mean death. I do however find that almost all of them are. If there isn't sex, then there is foul language, if not that then crude humor, and if not that then rebellion, or lying, or dishonoring parents, or dishonoring GOD! I don't think that Jesus or the disciples thought that lounging around Circus Maximus was fun. And even if the movie as a whole isn't "bad", do I really want to devote my time to watching it. Do I want to spend even 30 minutes entertaining myself with the same thing that the world is? So this week God has been challenging me to not look like, partake of, or share entertainment with anything of the world, but rather to spend my time partaking of the things of the Kingdom that I am a part of.

And there are a few shows that aren't horrible, and can even be educational, or a few movies that uphold what is good, and right, and true, but I want to spend the time that God has given me wisely. So if watching those things is wise, and spurs me on to love and good works more than praying, or more than reading Gods living word, then sure, I just might go for it. This is just what God has been challenging me with this week!

"You're an idiot"- Title of "sermon"

An assignment for my theatre class was to attend a local church, synagogue, or mosque. I really wish I could have/would have said that it was against my religion to go to a church building. But Bekah and I went to a late service at Feeling Place anyway. I figured it would be bad, but I honestly was not prepared for it. Yes, they had the lights, the background, million-dollar structure, and the seeker-friendly-ness, but what got me was the emotion of it all. It would have been so easy to get caught up in it. I didn't sing the songs, or even really listen to the "sermon", I just watched the people. "All the devotion was emotion." Standing there, I saw just how easy it was to completely throw yourself into the hyped-up worship service, and from there you would be open to just about anything, including one of the dumbest "sermons" you could possibly imagine. Thousands of people sit under that EVERY Sunday morning, and it doesn't seem like I am doing anything to help rescue them from such a vain existence. The only difference from me and them, is that God had the mercy to open my eyes to see what I was fighting against. And He gave me and is continuing to give me the strength to fight the structure, the rebellion, the emotion…the anti-Christ in myself. And since I have freely received, then why does it seem that I am not freely giving, even to the sheep with blinders???

A biography of myself for my Theatre class

The bottom of it is just footnotes, but you can read them if you want. I left out a few paragraphs, the ones with all my education stuff that is so boring. It is kinda sad because the footnotes are longer than what I have posted. But oh well.



Jordan Victoria Ward was born on April 27, 1990, the youngest of Ken and Carolyn Wards 6 daughters. She has resided in Baton Rouge, Louisiana since birth. Jordan was raised in a religious family, primarily Baptist in her early years. She then moved on to the denomination of “non-denominational” and now is simply a follower of Jesus Christ - no denomination, no facade, and no hidden agenda.

Jordan has spent 88% of her lifetime fully emerged in theatre of a different sort with performances that most wouldn’t readily recognize as theatrical. If examined through the textbook* definition of theatre it would most undoubtedly be classified as a typical performance. The theatre that I am speaking of is the pseudo-Christian “church”.

Including her experience in modern church Jordan has seen countless live theatrical productions, 2 or more a week for approximately 15 years, averaging around 1,560. They should be considered professional considering that producing a sermon was the profession of the educated preacher/pastor. However, she has moved on from this sort of theatrical performance, seeing as it is un-biblical. Jordan is now walking out her Faith through relationships with fellow Christians in a House Church.+



* Pgs. 7-9 of The Essential Theatre states very specifically is classified as theatre, beginning with the audience. The text very explicitly says that you must have an audience to have a theatre, and what more is a congregation of “church-goers”, except a glorified audience? (Ex. “It may permit spectators [congregation members] to surround the performers [preachers], require the audience [congregation] to sit in rows, facing a platform on which the performance occurs.”) The second statement that backs this theory is that of the performance. A “worship-service”, and sermon preached in your modern day church is just as much a performance as a circus sideshow. It is pleasing to the people, as opposed to pleasing to God, which if I am not mistaken, is what Christianity is all about. (Ex. “ Such spectators [congregation members] may resent or avoid any production that questions conventional moral, political, or social values…They support what appeals to them and fail to support what they do not like or do not understand…In turn, Broadway producers [Mega-church leaders, modern church], who need to recover the large sums required to mount a play [sermon] on Broadway [the pulpit], often avoid controversial subject matter [holiness, sin, exc.] or unfamiliar staging conventions [ meeting in the house instead of buildings, the way they did it in the Acts of the Apostles in the Bible] so as to attract as many theatregoers [churchgoers] as possible. Off-Broadway and regional theatres [House-churches] with lower costs and ticket-prices [ no building, all funds to go feed the hungry, cloth the naked, support orphans and widows], can afford to take greater chances, and may seek a more restricted audience [ the spot-less Bride of Christ who has remained untainted by the world] than that wooed by Broadway [ The modern Church]. “)

+ House Church is a meeting in homes rather than buildings. There is no preacher, but rather each person brings evidence that they have been with God throughout the week. It is the body of Christ, where every joint supplies with a word, a psalm, spiritual teaching, or prophecy that is all done for the edification of the body of Christ. It is a small intimate setting, there is little room for “acting” like a Christian, rather people are actually Christians, living out the Word of God.

A report I did for my Theatre 1020 class about an experience from a production

Teen Mania Ministries has summer camps that I attended a few years back. These camps had programs that were meant to inspire, there were speakers and teachers, videos, and dramatizations. They would set the mood by changing the atmosphere. They made a distinct transition from outdoor activities, to the indoor entertainment. They would then dim the lights and set of firecrackers on the stage. The music they played would set the ground (start the ball rolling) for whatever they were about to present to you. The skits would begin, they were meant to make you think, and examine how your life was in comparison to what they were showing. The scenes were deep and almost heavy feeling at times. They showed videos of orphans that desperately need sponsors, and told you things that you liked to hear. And every now and again they would mix in the Truth, but it was watered-down, and tainted with the materialism, psychobabble, and other things that appealed to human nature as opposed to Godly-nature. They would tell you about the love, joy, peace and happiness that came from being a “Christian”. At the time it sounded great, you were in a nice atmosphere, things were easy, and you had this great emotional high. Every year I would “re-dedicate” my life to the image of God that I created. It seems as though they just helped me make a better mask, so that the society couldn’t see that I was just a broken and messed up as they are. And with each year, came a more realistic the mask; and the better the mask, the easier it was to hide the fact that I really wasn’t a Christian as defined by the Word of God. I even seemed to hide it from myself. I would then go home, and after about two weeks the high was gone. So did the camps and the dramatizations change me in any way? No. I was still a dirty wretched sinner, on my way to hell. Only now I had a smile on my face, and a pat on the pack from the youth camp.

Now, if you ask if I have learned anything from those camps and dramatizations, I would now have to say, “Yes.” Though I didn’t learn anything from them while I was there, I can now see where the experience has helped shape who I am today. My eyes are now open to see what was presented at those camps in the Light. I see how it made me feel secure, and comfortable in my so-called-“Christianity”, and I see the lie that I believed. And because I now see the sin in being comfortable as opposed to challenged, and complacent as opposed to Holy, I am able to repent, and change the way that I think, especially about what True Christianity is. So now I have a reminder, I can look back at those camps and push forward, knowing that I never want to be the same again.

Any news on skydiving?

I changed the dates I was going to orientation because I wanted to go when one of my friends was going to be in the same session. It is set for 7/2-7/3. I have everything ready, the pencils, calculators, parking permit, and booklet in a bag ready to go.

On another note, I got LSU colored eyeshadow, never to be worn to school, maybe.

All of my registration papers have been faxed, and my immunization papers, etc.

I decided just to take the Alg. test, I figure that I should take the science classes even if I may have tested out, considering that it will be a major part of what I am studying.

The new phone I got, yeah, right out of the package the 6 key is jammed. Naturally the first thing I did was text, and it made for rather difficult texting. I will take it to the store tomorrow, and see if they can fix it.

Well, I have to go finish up my English III ( I have been putting it off, I hate re-doing reports, you have to change so much, I would almost rather just re-writing the whole thing, almost.)

History Video- We didn't start the fire by Billy Joel

Here is a REALLY cool video. It is easier to understand if you click the little lyrics? button in the bottom right hand corner.

Find the subliminal messages:This is what they say,

1. Here's an easy one.
2. "Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed." - Alexander Pope
3. "Every man dies. Not every man really lives." - Braveheart
4. "I can accept failure, but I can't accept not trying." - Michael Jordan
5. ESPECIALLY if you donate after watching, or at least click the ads =)
6. "Life is understood looking backwards but it must be lived forwards." - Soren Kierkegaard
7. "I am not young enough to know everything" - Oscar Wilde
8. "Always do what you are afraid to do." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

For school...

BJ, what typeface is "Arsenic and Old Lace" written in?

ACT

I take the ACT tomorrow. I haven't studied. I am taking it in april too, hopefully I will have gotten to study before then. Ok, well I have to go to work now. I will see everybody tomorrow at the sweetheart banquet.

I need help...any suggestions, it doesn't flow right, I am considering taking out the second stanza.It is for my English class.

My House

There are many thoughts and many ideals,
All brought together in my house.
There are many opinions, some stated,
Some not, all represented in my house;
Many rooms, each with different feelings,
Yet all in the same place, my house.

"Who can judge a book by its cover?"
Who can open a door with no key?
Who knows what secrets lie untold
Within the doors of my house?

My house is always changing,
People coming in, and going out,
Growing to have the mind of Christ,
Learning to put others first,
But one thing is always the same,
The foundation on which it stands:Jesus.


I never said I was a poet, and it is late, and I am tired, so give me a break. I give up for tonight, I have to be at work for 7 in the morning.I miss everyone.

Should someone rely on an animal to bring them happiness???

Alright...II am now at my peak...to add to the schedule, I will now be completing my English III class. Yes Deanna, this means that for the next six weeks, I will see you every Thursday for at least a few minutes. I also have gotten down to crunch time for studying for the ACT, and I hate my Business class...the woman is spastic, ADD or something. I have more important things to do with my time now...so I will leave you with the worst thing that is now on my plate...we got a dog.......

Don't even ask...

My play IS tomorrow, at 6:30pm, $3.00 at the door. Come early if you want to get a seat where you can hear without the stench of rotting carpet plaguing you nostrils the whole evening. It will last approx. 1-1 1/2 hours, everyone says it is funny, you won't hurt my feelings in the least bit if you don't come. I promise you. Have a good week.

I have the day off!!!!

I needed today, I go to school just to be sent home because Northeast is the only school who's lights go out on a perfectly clear day. I went to Mrs. Sara's and taught Kandi's class for today. It was great fun.

Play

My play is December 18 now, I don't care if people come or not, I am not sure how good it will turn out.

ACT-anything done, being done, or to be done; deed; performance(not really)

I got my ACT scores back. I made a 23. I figured it would be around there. I am most definately going to take it again. But, for now, I keep studying. What is going on tomorrow? I get off work at 5. Are we planning anything fun? Maybe we could finally cover the pool, and race cars over it. I will come home and vaccum the pool so we can. It may be kinda cold though. It is not the sort of thing where you can burry your hands in your pocket, they are kinda subjected to the ice cold freezing-ness.I suppose gloves could solve that problem though.

So much to say, so little time...

I found out today that while I was in the office for a conference (a week ago) a girl in my class was talking about me. She said that I though I was god or something, and that I was too holy. She said that there is nothing wrong with being religious, but that I took it to the extreme, that God was all that I talked about...ect. Well... that is a good report to me. I was fine with simply that. But my friend Rickey (man of peace) is in that class, and he heard it all.After like 20 minutes of it He got sick of it. He said "Yall go look in the bible, and tell me where it says you are not supposed to act just like her. She is prolly the most Holy, Godly girl in this whole school, much less the state." He said that shut them up really fast, and no one said another word. I thought it was funny.


Second story:

I think it is necessary to point out that I am a girl. I don't like cars, I barely understood how the engine worked (it took 2 hours and many drawings by a guy in my Spanish class last year to explain it, kinda neat, works in a unique way like the heart). Ok, so I decide to refill my oil, good thing to do, right? Not if you don't know how. Alright, I came home, popped the hood, and checked the level. It was low, so I had two 3-5 quart things of oil. I start pouring. I figured I would see it like gurgle and come up to the top of where I was putting it into, well it didn't. So I figured it was simply really low, so I go get the other thingy and pour, and pour, and pour...it doesn't come up to the top of where you pour. I went and got pop. He has to change the oil. It was my first time, I thought I was taking good care of my car, you know checking everything..yada yada.

So anyway, I need to finish my homework.

I have a revelation/insight on obedience to share, I will hopefully post it tomorrow.